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The story of twelve year old Yuliia: the girl who learned to smile again
Case study on support groups for children of Fallen Warriors
"Going to a psychologist is like taking a shower. It's not a luxury, but a necessity. I would advise against waiting until problems become unbearable; seek help in advance"*Names have been changed to protect confidentiality
Pain that had no outlet
Mrs. Anastasiia found herself abroad with her two children following the death of her husband, a soldier. Life in emigration added layers of difficulty to the challenges already faced by her 12-year-old daughter, Yuliia. Yuliia had always been cheerful and lively, but she began to exhibit previously unseen aggression.
"She is suffering greatly, worrying, and grieving for her dad, and those emotions are manifesting outwardly as increased aggressiveness," - shares Mrs. Anastasiia. The girl would lash out at her younger brother, and her mother immediately noticed a rise in her anxiety.
"Everything was visible in her behavior - negative or aggressive emotions would pour out onto me or her brother," - explains the mother, who realized these displays were the result of deep pain.
A chance find on Instagram
Mrs. Anastasiia, who herself has experience working as a psychologist, understood the value of professional support. She stumbled upon information about the NGO "Important" support groups on Instagram after a friend tagged her. This "find" became a lifeline for her.
"I immediately enrolled my daughter in the group. We had never worked in this format before, but I knew it was definitely something we needed to try," - Mrs. Anastasiia recounts. Since her daughter had prior experience with psychological consultations, she accepted the proposal without resistance. However, the group format, where other children had also experienced loss, was new and engaging for her. Yuliia eagerly prepared for every meeting, searching for "pebbles" or other items needed for the creative tasks.
The biggest discovery for the girl was realizing that she was not alone. "She was interested to see peers in the same situation. To see that she wasn't the only one. That, too, is healing”.
From anxiety to engagement
The results came quickly. The anxiety and aggression that had worried Mrs. Anastasiia significantly decreased. The girl became much friendlier with her brother, and their relationship improved. Most importantly, through the groups, Yuliia learned not to hide her feelings and to overcome her personal fears.
"Beyond those fears related to the war, my daughter overcame her own personal fears. She always left the sessions in a good mood. She became more self-assured - that’s a huge leap forward for her".
The most valuable outcome of participating in the group was that Yuliia learned to be active and expressive. "While someone else might sit silently, she started to express herself more," - the mother observed.
Why psychological support is the norm
Mrs. Anastasiia is convinced that in the context of war, psychological help must become an integral part of life, not an exceptional measure. "I would say that in the modern world, going to a psychologist is like taking a shower; it's just as necessary to do as Ukrainians getting a monthly manicure. It's simply a must-have".
Many mothers hesitate about seeking help, but Mrs. Anastasiia advises against waiting."I would advise, just as in medicine, not to wait until surgical intervention is necessary, but to seek help at the stage where light prevention can be done". She also emphasizes the importance of support for mothers who are grieving alongside their children but are often left to cope alone.
"Mothers also need help. One hundred percent. Because what we are going through, we are truly carrying by ourselves internally”.
Where to find support
Support groups are created specifically for children who have lost a father or mother in the war. This is free assistance provided by experienced psychologists through regular meetings.
If your adolescent is displaying aggression, withdrawing, or severely struggling with the loss of a parent-defender, don't wait for the situation to escalate. Support groups for children of fallen warriors are a safe space where children:● realize they are not alone in their grief;● learn to express their feelings;● overcome personal fears;● improve family relationships;● receive professional support from a psychologist and peers.
To enroll your child or learn more, reach out through our social media or register your child via our website on the “Children of Fallen Warriors” project page.
The story of twelve year old Yuliia: the girl who learned to smile again
Case study on support groups for children of Fallen Warriors
"Going to a psychologist is like taking a shower. It's not a luxury, but a necessity. I would advise against waiting until problems become unbearable; seek help in advance"*Names have been changed to protect confidentiality
Pain that had no outlet
Mrs. Anastasiia found herself abroad with her two children following the death of her husband, a soldier. Life in emigration added layers of difficulty to the challenges already faced by her 12-year-old daughter, Yuliia. Yuliia had always been cheerful and lively, but she began to exhibit previously unseen aggression.
"She is suffering greatly, worrying, and grieving for her dad, and those emotions are manifesting outwardly as increased aggressiveness," - shares Mrs. Anastasiia. The girl would lash out at her younger brother, and her mother immediately noticed a rise in her anxiety.
"Everything was visible in her behavior - negative or aggressive emotions would pour out onto me or her brother," - explains the mother, who realized these displays were the result of deep pain.
A chance find on Instagram
Mrs. Anastasiia, who herself has experience working as a psychologist, understood the value of professional support. She stumbled upon information about the NGO "Important" support groups on Instagram after a friend tagged her. This "find" became a lifeline for her.
"I immediately enrolled my daughter in the group. We had never worked in this format before, but I knew it was definitely something we needed to try," - Mrs. Anastasiia recounts. Since her daughter had prior experience with psychological consultations, she accepted the proposal without resistance. However, the group format, where other children had also experienced loss, was new and engaging for her. Yuliia eagerly prepared for every meeting, searching for "pebbles" or other items needed for the creative tasks.
The biggest discovery for the girl was realizing that she was not alone. "She was interested to see peers in the same situation. To see that she wasn't the only one. That, too, is healing”.
From anxiety to engagement
The results came quickly. The anxiety and aggression that had worried Mrs. Anastasiia significantly decreased. The girl became much friendlier with her brother, and their relationship improved. Most importantly, through the groups, Yuliia learned not to hide her feelings and to overcome her personal fears.
"Beyond those fears related to the war, my daughter overcame her own personal fears. She always left the sessions in a good mood. She became more self-assured - that’s a huge leap forward for her".
The most valuable outcome of participating in the group was that Yuliia learned to be active and expressive. "While someone else might sit silently, she started to express herself more," - the mother observed.
Why psychological support is the norm
Mrs. Anastasiia is convinced that in the context of war, psychological help must become an integral part of life, not an exceptional measure. "I would say that in the modern world, going to a psychologist is like taking a shower; it's just as necessary to do as Ukrainians getting a monthly manicure. It's simply a must-have".
Many mothers hesitate about seeking help, but Mrs. Anastasiia advises against waiting."I would advise, just as in medicine, not to wait until surgical intervention is necessary, but to seek help at the stage where light prevention can be done". She also emphasizes the importance of support for mothers who are grieving alongside their children but are often left to cope alone.
"Mothers also need help. One hundred percent. Because what we are going through, we are truly carrying by ourselves internally”.
Where to find support
Support groups are created specifically for children who have lost a father or mother in the war. This is free assistance provided by experienced psychologists through regular meetings.
If your adolescent is displaying aggression, withdrawing, or severely struggling with the loss of a parent-defender, don't wait for the situation to escalate. Support groups for children of fallen warriors are a safe space where children:● realize they are not alone in their grief;● learn to express their feelings;● overcome personal fears;● improve family relationships;● receive professional support from a psychologist and peers.
To enroll your child or learn more, reach out through our social media or register your child via our website on the “Children of Fallen Warriors” project page.